Yes you are.
It’s what you Google the most, isn’t it? What you want to ask other people but are too scared of the answer. Looking for something, anything that will give you definitive proof of what you suspect. That something is wrong. That this way of living, of feeling this way, isn’t normal.
But how much though? How much is too much to drink? I need actual statistics surely?
You don’t actually. And you won’t get them. Firstly because everyone is different from a physiological point of view, so another person’s alcohol consumption becomes irrelevant to yours.
Secondly because you’ll be surrounding yourself more and more with heavy drinkers in a bid to feel better, so your perspective on normal drinking from a social point of view is already warped.
And thirdly because you’re most likely already lying to yourself about how much you drink anyway so you genuinely won’t be able to answer the question accurately.
I wanted to know so badly. For years I hoped that if I searched long enough I’d find conclusive proof I wasn’t behaving normally. I never found it. If I wanted it today I’d still struggle to find it. It turns out that all I really needed to know was this:
If you’re asking the question in the first place? You’re drinking too much. If you have to question your drinking at all. To explain it, justify it in any way, at any point, to yourself or to anybody else? Then you’re drinking too much. If it is affecting your life in any way big or small, you’re drinking too much. And the moment any of this happens is the moment to stop. Don’t wait for things to get worse.
Alcohol isn’t supposed to be a central focus of anyone’s life. It really isn’t. It’s a side attraction. An incidental accompaniment to meeting friends or having a celebration. If it’s taking up your headspace, or wasting your time, or distracting you from the real business of living your life?
Then you’re drinking too much.
And if this feels like incredibly bad news to you? That to stop drinking right now would be any sort of loss?
Then you don’t need me. You’ve already answered your own question.